And by "high standards," I'm not talking about cards embossed in foil. I'm not talking about envelopes addressed in calligraphy. I'm not even talking about cards accompanied by glitter or ribbons or confetti. (Though, oh my gosh, I totally want to send Christmas cards stuffed with confetti now that I've thought of it.)
No, what I'm talking about is personalization: A clever photo. An original letter. A new idea or theme for each year. And, honestly, the cheesier we can make it, the better.
Like our "Merry Christmas from Rock-chester" card that included pictures of everyone in the family fake-playing (and rocking out to) different instruments.
Or our "Have a Very Hairy Christmas" card that featured the whole family in fake mustaches — except for our 9 year old, naturally, who sported massive fake lamb chops.
This year, though, to add to the list of COVID-era indignities, our Christmas card is super lame.
This may be the thing I'm most disappointed about since March. And I had to miss two vacations AND an Elton John concert this summer. This is the level of importance I place on this Christmas card.
When I sat down to make our annual greeting on Sunday night, I realized two things:
1. We have taken zero family photos in 2020. Literally zero. We took pictures of the boys — Bergen in his graduation gown; Christian raising a glass on his 21st birthday. And we took pictures of Jay and I — mostly selfies to send to the boys. But we took no pictures of the four of us together. All year.
2. The photos we did take look like people who've been in quarantine. And who have mostly forgotten how to use a comb.
So there I sat at my laptop on Sunday night, trying to figure out how to arrange a last-minute, last-ditch family pic … with the boys now living hundreds of miles away. That's when I had the brilliant idea to make a card with FaceTime screenshots. That is, after all, how we're mostly seeing the boys these days.
I had saved Christmas.
I FaceTimed the boys. They actually answered. I took screenshots of them both. Everything was going according to plan.
And then I put those photos in a card template — and it looked like I was sharing season's greetings and holiday cheer with mug shots of our teenage sons.
So I went back to our year of bad photos. And I picked the five or six that were least bad. Like the picture of Jay standing on the edge of Lake Bemidji. And a close up of me laughing. Bergen in his graduation gown in front of Century High School. Christian on the Little Thistle patio on his 21st birthday. Sweet Daisy Dog resting her face on her paws.
And I put them all together. And I wrote captions. And I placed that holiday card order. And immediately had five ideas for better cards.
Jennifer Koski is associate editor at Rochester Magazine. Her column appears Tuesdays. Send comments to jkoski@rochestermagazine.com.
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It's not so easy being very cheesy - PostBulletin.com
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